Thinking

So I was thinking today about why we are here where we are in life and all the things that have gotten us here. What it ultimately comes down to is being happy about the choices that are in front of you and the goals that you set. I think some people doubt or question why we are here or if we are really happy. Those of you who know me and my family know that despite normal family challenges and trials, are generally very close. I would even say very close at points. But we have been brought up and raised to be kind and considerate and loving and friendly to not just those around us but each other. Our family has been through many MANY trials and challenges and heartbreaks. Losses, marriages, babies, among other things. But all in all, we are friends (with effort from some) and we love each other and would do just about anything for each other. Even though we all have different opinions on some things and the same on other, ultimately it's about being a forever family that counts and that's what really matters to all of us. So why then, would Matt and I "uproot" our own family and move 2 and a half hours away from the people we claim (and actually do) love more than anything? How could we bear to be away from them and not see them as often? It's easy for me because for so long Matt and I have wanted to move to a small town to raise our child(ren). We never wanted to stay in the city forever and my family knew that. I believe that there was A LOT of doubt about us ever moving away or this far away at first but we kept talking about it and it finally happend. I prayed about it and it wasn't more than a week later, we found a place in Raymond because we had to move out of the place we were currently residing in. I am literally living mine and Matt's dream. It happened a lot sooner than we planned, but we could not be happier about the decision to move here. It certainly hasn't come without it's own challenges but in the eternal perspective, this is so worth it. And I keep saying this and I'll keep on saying it, we are so happy down here. It is the best decision we have made for us. I have not, for one moment wished that we didn't live here. I love visiting Calgary to see my family and friends, but you could not pay me enough to move back up there. Even Lethbridge. I want to live in a small town, not a small city. I say the same thing about the U.S. There is no way I would ever live down there. There is not enough money in this entire world that would make me change my mind. It's nice to visit, but I would not ever live down there. When Hell freezes over, then I would live there. There would be no way we could afford medical coverage for us and Tanner, plus it's too crazy there.
I love living here and I love that I get to stay home with Tanner. That's so important to Matt and I. I feel for those of you who have to leave their children in the care of others. I can't imagine leaving Tanner to be raised by someone else. I understand that for some, it's the only way to make ends meet. I get that. I don't need a bunch of back lash because people don't think I get that. I do! I think that it's selfish of people who leave their kids in the care of others because they want the money or they don't want the responsibility of raising their own kids full time.
I had a lady I worked for years ago before I was married that lived like this and it really bothered me. I was basically a mother's helper so she could nap when she wanted (she had a newborn) and go to yoga or power walks. I cooked, cleaned, picked up her kids and dropped them off at school, groccery shopped for her. I just don't get people like that. It seems like having money is more important than being the best parent you can be. We all have bad days, I know that. But to resent that you have to be responsible for doing these kinds of things because you can't do what you want, when you want is totally unreasonable to me.
I worked after I had Tanner but I was so imensley blessed to be able to take Tanner with me. I was so fortunate and lucky. Not everyone has that. I wish more people did.
Anyway, I was just thinking about how blessed Matt and I are to be where we want to be and have such wonderful people in our lives.
Anyway, I think that's it for now. I have to go. I get to have supper with Tanner AND Matt because he's home today. Yea!!!