Should I???

I really should be getting to bed right now but I just finished reading my friends' blogs...and some blogs that I just "stalk" and I feel like I have stuff to say.

First off, thank you to everyone for the kind comments on my previous post. Sharon, you made me cry a little because that is the nicest thing you could have said/written.

I got to go to Relief Society this week (I get to go for the last 15 minutes while Matt sits with my class for closing exercises) and the lesson was on Motherhood. I so wish that I was there for the whole lesson. It was SOOOOO good. Motherhood is a subject that I could never get tired of talking about.

I am so thankful for the child that I was blessed with. I know that having a child with differences has made me grown in ways that I couldn't have otherwise. There are always moments where you roll your eyes or your child is misbehaving, but underneath it all, I never wish that I could have a different child. Or even a "normal" child. Tanner is such a blessing in so many unfathomable ways. The joy I have being his mother is like none other. Other than having a testimony of the gospel and of Jesus Christ, there is no greater joy to me than being HIS mother. Not just A mother, but a mother to Tanner.
I think sometimes, people don't know how to act or treat people with differences and I understand that. After coming out of the hospital from being there 12 days, I didn't know how to act around people that had "normal" babies because Tanner was all I knew and came to love. But in time, it wasn't so awkward for me. There will always be people that look and have questions or say mean things but then there are those like the kids at his school that I don't even know that know Tanner and say hi. Or those who go out of their way to help him and include him. Or those who share with him, or help him. And children of all ages. Today when we were leaving the school there was a girl that is in our ward who was playing at the park and she said hi to Tanner as we walked by. She's 2 years older than him and it kind of surprised me that she said hi. 2 weeks ago, this same girl asked to help Tanner specifically in sharing time with matching some stuff. It just amazes me at how kind and loving people are. It will help make my job a little easier when he gets older and kids get meaner. I will be able to say "look at all the people that do love you no matter what"

Life is made up of so many little moments. Like the moments that take your breath away because as your helping them put on their shoes and they just will say "Mommy, I love you", or moments that make you want to cry because they sing I am a child of God to his little monkey, or moments that surprise you when they ask you to tell them the consequence of a rule they broke, or when you get up in the morning and ask you if you need your glasses on to see. There are so many little moments that make up the joy of being a mother. The supposed big stuff isn't that big anymore. It's the little things that build up to it that make it so great. Like working on learning to cut wtih scissors for the last 6 months and he can finally do it. Or hearing his teachers say how well he is doing.

I love being a mom.