Yesterday as I was making a special Halloween treat for Tanner I tipped over the bread machine container, which was filled with water, and it spilt all over the counter. My first thought was "if Matt had done the dishes (because it was his turn to do them), this wouldn't have happened". Then I remembered something I heard from someone about how it is the woman's job/responsibility to look after the house because the men go out to work. This doesn't sit well with me because I think that to be equally yoked, as we are told to be, means, at least to me, that everyone shares in all responsibilities. I do most of the cooking, for example, but Matt does know how to cook and likes to cook when he has the chance to. But I would never expect Matt to do certain things because I did other specific jobs (I hope that makes sense). I know Matt works full time outside of the home but I don't think that's a reason to come home and not help out with dishes or parenting (and I am in NO WAY saying that Matt does that, this is just an example) or cleaning up. I think it's stereotyping when a man is expected to only do certain things and a woman is expected to do only certain things.
I did end up cleaning the mess and did the dishes (which I don't mind doing most of the time) but it was just something I thought about as I was making these treats for Tanner and wondered what it means to everybody else to be equally yoked with your spouse.
3 years ago
6 comments:
John and I definitely have jobs. He always takes out the trash and usually does the grocery shopping (a chore I absolutely hate!) And he never does the laundry (except his work clothes) or cleans the bathrooms. We have an unspoken agreement about these things. I know that if I asked him to, he would take care of absolutely everything though. Making dinner and doing dishes are fair game. This is just what works for us. John has never acted like he should get out of household chores or parenting because he works outside the home. This is probably partly because until last year, we were both working outside the home!
I agree!!
I know what you are saying Mandy. And I agree with you.
The "man's job" is only "9 to 5".
The "woman's job" is 24 hrs.
That doesn't look equally yoked to me.
I love that MY man comes home after his 8 hrs (or whatever) and steps right up to the plate to help out for the remaining hrs of the day that work needs to be done in. When apart.....we work individually for whatever hours that may be. When back together.....we work side by side equally sharing in the duties for whatever hours that may be.
And........if he is gone working a full 24 hrs.......then I am working hard by myself too.....working hard the same hours he is, just apart. Even if we aren't seeing each other or working side by side......I feel that we are equally working together. Does that make sense?
Works for me! And I love it. ; )
Eeek, right now our situation is a little different, since Paul is still looking for a job and I'm working from home. BUT, we both help equally with housework, and equally with parenting. I agree, that's important. It's not about boxes, it's about teamwork. There are things that I hate doing (taking out the garbages, cleaning the toilet...) and things that Paul hates doing (vacuuming, feeding the baby...) but sometimes one of us gets busy, and the other one will suck it up. We try to balance things out so that the other person doesn't have to do their most despised chore, but we don't mind doing them if we have to. The important thing is that our home is clean and that our family is healthy and happy.
I totally agree... I think every marriage should have equal share. Not always meaning that you share everything 50%, but that no one feels like they do it all. For instance, Todd doesn't like to cook. 99.9% of the time I do it, but he also does 99.9% of the work on our cars. We each play to our strengths. Somethings we split, like vacumming. I just don't like the notion that men work outside of the home and women should do all the work inside. I think the same goes with people who pay their kids to do every little chore. I think there should be some things you do just because you live there. If you use the bathroom, you should have to take a turn cleaning it... ect. Just my two cents!
Amen sister! Sounds like the lot of us ended up with some good men:)
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